Sometimes I have those days where I pretty much SUCK doing my job as a mother. Oh yes, I know what you are all thinking…..no, it’s not true! not you!!
But let me assure you…there are days when I go to sleep at night wishing I had a “do over” for the day. Today is one of those days.
I was woken up by Afton. I have no idea what time it was because I was dead to the world.
She was standing by my bedside, dressed and ready for school.
That time already? Darn! I soooo didn’t want to get up.
“Mom,” she said, “Tony’s taking us to school.”
“Okay,” I said, relieved. “Have a good day.”
I rolled back over in my bed, glad to be able to sleep at least 30 minutes more.
Having an older son who can drive sure can be great, I thought. And then I remembered.
Crap! Today is the last day of school!
Here I wanted to make the girls a nice breakfast on their last day of school. I was going to wake up when they did (which is a big push for me!) and like a good mother make their breakfast, make their lunches, and drive them to school, kiss them on the cheek and tell them to have a great day.
But did I do that? No. Instead, I slept in like a lazy person….forgetting it was the last day of school. With those two, there are only so many more years that I will be seeing them off to school in the mornings, and I’m feeling like I’m wasting the time that I have left. High school goes by so quickly!
So that is how my day started. I felt terribly guilty that I did not drive the girls to school on their last day. The Mommy-Guilt hit me hard. I tried to shake it off.
Just when the Mommy-Guilt was starting to go away, Aislynn ran into my room. She had just woken up, still in pajamas and ruffled bed-head.
“Mom!” she said in disgust. “The tooth fairy didn’t come!”
Ahhhh. The Tooth Fairy. Of course. I knew I forgot to do something last night before bed. She had pulled out that second tooth yesterday and was so excited about the Tooth Fairy coming again.
“Did you put your tooth under you pillow so she could find it?”
“Well….was your bedroom door open so that she could get in?”
“Oh, Honey….sometimes that darn Tooth Fairy…she just gets too busy with all the teeth she has to collect, and she doesn’t come that first night. Or sometimes not even the second night. Just go ask your older brothers and sisters…they will tell you. I’m sure she will come tonight. Just keep it under your pillow.”
And so, she marched out of the room.
Strike two for me.
Later in the day, Rich came home and took Aislynn to preschool for me. She starts at 12:30 and gets out at 3:30. Before I agreed to let him take her for me, I thought to myself: Is there anything important going on in her school today? Tomorrow is her last day, and they are having the BBQ tomorrow. So today is not the last day of school, so there is nothing that I am missing. Cool. I’ll let Rich take her and pick her up, and I can stay home and do the things I need to do around here.
So Rich left with Aislynn and the other kids. He dropped her off at preschool, then took the other kids to Chuck E. Cheese. I was able to do some laundry and relax in a bath while they were gone. He was going to come home after picking up Aislynn at school…I had until about 3:40 to myself….
It was well past 4:00 when he got home. I thought maybe he had stopped at the store. When the kids were all out of ear shot, he whispered to me, “Hey…um, did you forget that Aisy had her preschool graduation today?”
My heart dropped to my stomach. I couldn’t believe it. “What?!! I thought that was tomorrow, with the BBQ and the last day of school celebration and all that!”
“No…the graduation was today. Tomorrow is only the BBQ.”
So, I missed it. I am soooo beyond upset. I missed her graduation day. I suck! I suck! I suck! No matter what anyone tells me, I know I suck.
Rich said that when he went there at 3:30 to pick her up, there was a crowd in the classroom. A bunch of parents were there, with cameras and videos.
“What’s going on?” Rich asked someone. (aren’t we just pathetic parents…to have to ASK what’s going on during this special day!)
Someone told him, “The graduation is about to start. They will march the kids in now.”
Sure enough, all the kids started to walk into the classroom right about that time. Rich tried to pretend as if he knew what was going on when Aislynn saw him. He said they sang songs, they listened as the teacher talked about the class, and she got her certificate. He said that the whole thing lasted about 30 minutes because they had cake afterwards.
Cake! This was a big deal, and I missed it! I know it’s only preschool, but still. This is my JOB, people! I’m supposed to show up for things like this!
Rich tried to make me feel better. He told me that there were a lot of parents taking video, so he’s sure that I can get a copy. A copy of someone else’s video? You know it will have close-ups of their kid singing…and we will be lucky if Aislynn is even shown at all. Aislynn will ask “How come you are zooming in on that kid and not me?” for the rest of her life. Ugh. I hate getting video from other parents! It’s never the same as taking your own.
((I am very thankful, however, that Rich was there for the whole thing. Man, I can’t even imagine how awful I would feel if no one showed up for Aislynn! What if it had started at 3:00 or some other time, and Rich had missed it, too? Oh my gosh, that would have been awful.))
So I called Aislynn over to me.
I said, “Hey…how did school go?”
She just looked at me.
Was it my imagination, or was she glaring at me?
I tried again,”Honey…how did school go today? Can you show me the things that you got?”
She sighed loudly, and she left the room and came back with her black graduation cap and her certificate.
“Oh!” I said, overly excited.”This is so nice! Hey, weren’t you just so excited that Daddy was there to see your graduation?”
She looked at me as if wondering where I was going with this…
I continued, “Wasn’t that nice that he was able to go! Because normally he’s at work, right?”
She nodded her head, but still no words.
“You know why Daddy went today instead of me? Because he can’t go to tomorrow’s BBQ because he has to be at work. But guess what? I’m going to your BBQ tomorrrow. Won’t that be fun?”
I think she was on to me. She’s smarter than I give her credit for.
Kids always are.
But slowly she smiled, and she said, “Okay.”
And then I
made her asked her to put her cap on so I could snapped this picture. You know, so I’d have a memory of this day.