Last night, she took her shower and washed her hair, and then when I went to say goodnight to her, she was sleeping with soaking wet hair. I said, “Get up! Go dry your hair! You’re getting the pillow all wet, plus your hair will look awful in the morning!” and she moaned, “Mom….no. I don’t want to dry my hair. I’m going to sleep with it wet. I’m an ADULT now, and I can if I want to.” and I was like, “What? I don’t think so!” and I made her get UP and DRY her hair. I’m awful that way, I guess, because I still insist that my kids look decent when they leave this house, no matter what their age. And when she goes to bed with wet hair, it looks flat and dirty-looking in the morning. So, I made her get up to dry it. Plus, she was ruining her pillow (that I bought!)
Tony has an “I’m an adult” card but he never tries to use it on us — smart kid. He knows he’s living one foot out the door now, anyway, being that he’s almost twenty. He’s not ready to move out on his own yet; he knows this, we know this — but still. He’s at that age where he could be and perhaps should be on his own. He’s got his own car insurance (not on our policy) and his own cell phone account (on his own plan, not ours) so he is getting used to paying his own bills. Somewhat. I’m sure that in the next year or so he will be out living with friends or something. He would do that now if any of his friends were ready to move out. But they aren’t!
I’m thinking back to when I was 18, 19, and 20 years old. I had quite a few friends who were moved out of the family home and living in apartments with roommates at that age. Sure, a few of us were still living at home, but the majority of guys that I knew were already out of the home and on their own by the age of 20. Have times changed? They must have, because it’s very common now for adult children to live in their family home past of the ages of 20 and 21.
We are going to have one crowded house, if that’s the case. A house full of small children is one thing. A house full of adults is quite another!
My daughter is 20, and just moved into the dorm for the second time. The first time she was only 18, and just so not ready for that environment. She moved in after Christmas, in one of the dorms that has it’s own kitchen and bathroom, with a very nice roommate. Liz (stepdaughter) has been in the dorms since her freshman year and has LOVED being on her own a little. We still buy them some groceries, and pay for cell phones, but they each pay their own school bills, car payments and car insurance. They are growing up – but I won’t be too surprised to see them move back home after school!
HI Trina,
You’re right- times have changed. My boys are 21 (almost 22) and 19-both technically at home (although Travis is staying with his grandma in Vegas while going to school). Grant Jr. is not ready to move out; although he does pay for his cell phone, car insurance, and he pays us rent. He has it made living at home!
Debby Higgins