I’ve been trying to figure out a way to write Aiden’s birth story. All the other birth stories that I read are so beautifully written, capturing every magical moment. I wanted mine to be written like that! And I’ve been trying. But after a few attempts, I’ve come to accept that there’s no way for me to write it like that. I have to keep it real. And that’s not to say his birth wasn’t beautiful or magical – it was, simply because he was born, and that is a very beautiful and magical moment. But the hour and 20 minutes leading up to that special moment were not serene, calm, or poetically beautiful. They were intense, chaotic, and a bit loud.
Just so you know, I always make the “perfect” birth plan up in my head. Weeks before I’m due, I select beautiful songs that I want playing while I labor. I set up the room with candles that I want lit during my labor. I have ideas in my head of the “perfect photos” that I want to capture during my labor; of my husband gently stroking my head, or of me resting my head on his shoulder after a tiring contraction. Photos that capture all the magical love of the moment.
But it just never goes that way for me! My labors are just too darn short. While I “labor”, everyone around me is busy getting everything ready; rushing to fill the birth pool, rushing to set up all the equipment in the room. Rushing, rushing, rushing. Because they know the baby is coming fast.
There really is no time for me to enjoy the early labor time. I don’t ease into labor anymore, like I did with my first three or four labors, where you feel a contraction and then wait for the next one…wondering if this is “it” or if it’s just false labor. Then the next one happens and you look at the clock and start timing them; ten minutes apart, eight minutes apart, six minutes….and then hours later you are at two minutes apart. That is easing into labor, where you have time to play the sweet, calming music that you’ve put together for this special time, where you turn the lights down and light all the scented candles…
That is how I always envision it going for me. But that is not how it goes. So I will write my own sort of birth story, complete with the pictures that show the real story, and they are not all that magical and beautiful. But they are real. And just so you know, the photos are not graphic … so you can relax about that (Cranky, I had you in mind while deciding on which photos to show) but you will see a very pregnant belly, and one water shot after the baby is born (but it’s very blurry so you don’t really see anything, but hey you all know where babies come from, so don’t act all surprised by the water birth shot. I don’t want to hear it.) Oh, and the photos are in black and white, which help keep everything a bit mellow.
So without much more explanation, here is Aiden’s birth story….
*****
It was Sunday, June 2nd. We had a busy day with kids’ sports, but lucky for me my husband was home and I rested most of the day. I got into the bath at around 10:30pm. This is my normal routine, to take a bath before bed. Rich was in the next room, our bedroom, watching the news. I stayed in the bath, reading and playing on my iPhone, for about an hour. Yes, an hour. I take long baths. So at 11:30 I got out of the bath, dried off, and got into bed. Rich had not fallen asleep yet, so I asked him to rub my lower back, which is always hurting me at the end of the day.
He started to rub my back, and then I felt a contraction. This was normal for me, too, as I had been having contractions for the past 3 weeks. Just a tightening of my stomach, the typical Braxton Hicks contractions. Only this one wasn’t stopping, and it got painful right away, enough so that I told Rich to STOP rubbing my back.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Contraction.” I said. “It hurts.”
“IS IT TIME?!!! Should I call Sue?!!!” (Sue is our midwife)
He sat up in the bed and started acting all nervous, and that bothered me.
“Calm down and don’t over react!” I snapped. “Just let me be for a second!”
So after taking this picture of me (isn’t it lovely?) Rich gets back into bed and says to wake him if this is the “real” thing. I knew it was the real thing, but whatever. I let him get back into bed simply because I didn’t want him making a fuss at that time. I wanted a few minutes to myself. He falls asleep in like 30 seconds (firemen are trained to do this) and so I stay in this position. Five minutes go by….and BAM…another contraction hits. I ride it through and wait. Five minutes later…BAM…another contraction hits. This time I grip the headboard because it hurts more than the last two. When it’s over, I stay in this position and reach my right hand waaaaay over to Rich’s side of the bed and I snap my fingers loudly in his ear. SNAP! SNAP! SNAP!
“Rich! Up! Now! Get up. This is it. Wake up!”
He slowly gets out of bed and rubs his face, staring down at me. Just standing there. I stay in this position and tell him things that I need him to do. But he just stares at me, looking sleepy.
“Wake up!” I tell him.
He’s stands there, rubbing his face. “I’m awake. I’m awake.” But I can see his eyes and he is not really awake. He is Sleepy Rich, and Sleepy Rich is agitating me, big time.
He’s stands there, rubbing his face. “I’m awake. I’m awake.” But I can see his eyes and he is not really awake. He is Sleepy Rich, and Sleepy Rich is agitating me, big time.
“You are NOT awake….” I growl at him. “Go right now into the bathroom and splash cold water on your face.”
“….but I’m awake.”
“DO IT NOW! WATER! ON YOUR FACE – NOW! GO!”
He disappears into the bathroom and I hear the water running.
By that time, another contraction hit and I realized that I need to be moving through these, because they are getting intense. So I get up and start walking around. I tell Rich to start filling the birthing pool, because it’s going to happen soon. There was no warm up to this labor, no easy laboring part that I can enjoy. I was just pushed right into the intense part of labor. I was immediately in what I like to call, my Agitated State. This is where you don’t really want to be around me.
“Do you want me to put your play list on so you can have your music in the background?” Rich asks me. So sweet of him to think of that for me. And how to I reply?
“NO!!! NO MUSIC!!!” Grrrrrrrr!
“Okay, well do you want me to light some of the candles?”
“NO! NO CANDLES!” Arrrrrrrr!
See? I was already past all that. I was in the agitated state where I wanted NOTHING but to get this baby out.
“Well, do you want me to wake the kids?” he asked.
“NO!! Do NOT wake the kids! NO KIDS!!!”
Poor Rich. He was trying.
My midwife is in route by this time. She only lives about 15 minutes away. I knew she would be here soon, so I wasn’t even concerned about that. My only real concern was if that birthing pool would be filled with the correct temperature before the baby was born. I really wanted him to be born in water. And I was thinking, damn these quick labors!
Here I am hugging the wall during a contraction.
See the hose running out of the shower behind me?
It went straight into our bedroom
and was filling the birthing pool, which was at the foot of our bed.
Our midwife and her assistant arrived and immediately got busy setting up the room. They bring with them a lot of supplies and emergency equipment (just in case) so it’s a busy time while they get things ready. Rich was able to tend to me at that time, so he rubbed my lower back during some contractions.
I’m not sure who took this picture.
I think my midwife must have picked up my camera during this time.
I will say that Rich helped a lot during these last few contractions.
The pain I had on my lower back was greatly reduced when he applied pressure.
After that photo where Rich is rubbing my back, the next contraction that hit me was the kind where I found myself bearing down. It’s a different kind of contraction all together; it’s the kind that pushes the baby down the birth canal. So after THAT contraction, I KNEW I needed to get into that tub.
“Can I get it NOW?” is what I was saying when this picture was taken.
and here I am with my hand on my hip,
obviously a bit peeved that I had to wait to get into the birthing tub.
I can almost see my foot tapping with impatience…
My belly is hang’n very low…baby is coming soon!
My belly is hang’n very low…baby is coming soon!
And about two minutes later, I got the okay to get into the pool. The temperature has to be just right. The baby has to be born into the same temperature that my body is, or as close as possible. So that is why I had to wait.
As soon as I got into the pool, things started happening even more quickly. I didn’t get time to relax in the water. Not at all. I got into the pool, and then the next contraction moved the baby into the birth canal. It was exhausting. Those contractions really take a lot out of me.
As soon as I got into the pool, things started happening even more quickly. I didn’t get time to relax in the water. Not at all. I got into the pool, and then the next contraction moved the baby into the birth canal. It was exhausting. Those contractions really take a lot out of me.
My face here cracks me up. But yeah, it’s like that.
At this time, Rich was walking around the birthing pool, trying to figure out where he wanted to be for the birth. The midwife asked, “Do you want to get into the pool with her?” and I said, “NO!!! I DON’T WANT HIM IN HERE!!!” I realize now that I was a bit rude with my answer, but remember…I was in my agitated state. This is not the real me. This is the about to push a big baby out of my body me…and she isn’t always nice.
The next contraction that hit …. well, that one pushed the baby further down the birth canal and began the crowning stage. NOT FUN AT ALL. For me, that is the part that I absolutely hate about giving birth. I won’t say that I freak out…but let’s just say that I do NOT remain CALM at all during this point, as the next picture will prove…
And there it is. This was the contraction that about did me in.
Don’t I look like I’m having fun?
Rich saw what I was going through at this moment, and I’m sure he had every intention of trying to comfort me through it… but apparently he had an itch on his back that needed to be taken care of first.
That major contraction finally ended, and this is when Rich patted my shoulder and tried to comfort me by saying, “You’re doing great! He’s almost out! I can see the head!”
And this was my “OH MY GAWWWD DON’T TOUCH ME
DON’T TALK TO ME YOU DID THIS TO ME” moment.
Check out my eyes. I am NOT in my happy place.
Husbands: don’t talk to your laboring woman when she has these eyes. Just don’t.
And the very next contraction hit just a minute later, and the baby’s head and his body came right out – all at once – and very quickly! After one long and continuous contraction, he was OUT and floating in the water! And immediately I turned right back into the old me. The agitated, crazy me was gone. And the real me was left there, smiling…..
Rich grabbed him up from the water …
and put him onto my chest.
The BEST feeling. Ever.
It was 1:05am on June 3, 2013.
Once he was out and lying on my chest, Audriana and Avery came into the room. They were excited to see that I had the baby. I told them to go wake up the other kids. Soon they all started coming into the room, looking very sleepy, but still excited to see their baby brother.
Aiden seems to be waving hello to his siblings in this picture.
He’s like, “What’s up, guys? I’m here!”
We took this quick photo with some of the kids and then they were back to bed. It was late, and everyone but me was tired. I got that adrenaline rush, you know, that keeps me wired for a few hours after the birth. Nature’s way of being sure the new mama is alert to take care of her new baby!
While I was sitting in the birthing pool waiting for Aiden’s cord to stop pulsing, my midwife noticed that he had a true knot in his cord. And I was like, wow….that’s scary. Thank goodness it never tightened up enough to cut off the oxygen and blood flow from the placenta. I hear those stories and they break my heart.
He was so quiet while sitting in there with me. He was warm and cozy and just very calm.
I think he thought he was still in the womb.
We waited until the cord stopped pulsing….
and then Rich cut the cord.
And he was free from me! Just like that.
Daddy then held him, skin to skin.
Next, Aiden was checked over and then weighed by my midwife. She has attended all four of my home births, by the way. She’s awesome.
This blanket contraption is connected at the top to a weight lever — midwives use this to weigh the babies. The babies just sort of dangle in the blanket, all cozy and snug.
Aiden weighs in at 9 pounds 14 ounces!
Not my biggest baby, but still a very BIG baby!
This is one of my favorite photos. It’s about 3:00 in the morning, just two hours after his birth. Our midwife and her assistant had just left. Rich got into bed and fell right asleep, and Aiden did, too. Only I was up, still high on the adrenaline rush from the baby’s birth. And I couldn’t stop staring at him.
After all those early weeks of this pregnancy, wondering…was this baby going to make it? Even as each month passed, I never quite believed it would be true. And yet, he is finally here. Our Rainbow Baby. We have our sweet boy, our number ten. We’ve waited so long for him. And now he’s here…
and he completes our family so perfectly!
linking up with
This is a wonderful story–thank you for sharing! You’e got a goreous son. Congrats to you and the entire family!!
This is a beautiful birth story! congratulations.
Well that’s the first time I’ve ever laughed out loud while reading a birth story! Who wants boring calm and serene, Aiden will love reading that when he’s older. He is so adorable and I’m sure he’s loved to bits by all his brothers and sisters. I’ve never seen a knotted cord before. My no. 5 was born with his waters intact and had a heart shaped placenta!
Lots of love to you all xx
PS I love Rich’s “Trina” tattoo!
Great pics & story! Such a cutie!
He is amazing, Katrina! And your birth story was awesome…and just perfect. I love how real you are! Congratulations!!
This was a great birth story! I’ve never ‘attended’ a water birth, and feel like I got to be a part of this blessed event. He’s a beautiful little guy! Congratulations!
Seeing that knot is/was scarey. So glad the outcome was your beautiful baby boy. Congrats to you and your wonderful family.
Now, thats the way to have a baby! I have had 3 c-sections so I enjoy reading birth stories. Your was one of the best!
Donna, ny
It’s Aiden’s birth story, so however he came into this world is perfect! Loved every single word of it : )
Love you too…
❤
Wow, what a great story! I’ve had two babies, but we never really photographed the births as up close and personal as you did, so I was AMAZED by how low your belly was! And then I realized, of course,that must be what happens when the baby drops head down into the birth canal. Labor really is amazing. A trial, for sure, but amazing. I thought at first that you guys had tied a knot in the cord to get ready for cutting it, the knot was just so..perfect isn’t the right word, but you know what I mean. It looks intentional. My heart stopped when I realized that no, that had happened on its own. So glad you are both ok. He’s gorgeous, and HUGE. Both of mine were 6 lbs 15 oz. A nine pounder would TERRIFY me.
Also, please forgive me for saying so, but your husband fits that “hot firefighter” cliche to a T. 😉
Thank you for writing your birth story. It is real and honest and magical. And the pictures are worth a thousand words! I’ve only had two children and my labors were long and none of it felt calm or like I anticipated. But they were both perfect because I brought home two beautiful girls. Congratulations to you on a great job of bringing Aiden Richard into the world. Your husband looks so proud and sweet. About your blog header, I have NO blog/technical knowledge but can the artist just add the baby in your arms and keep the rest the same? Wishing you much rest and peace.
I laughed and cried through this birth story. I cried because I always cry at birth stories
I laughed because it’s hilarious and so completely true!! And if I ever get pregnant again, I’m showing Hubby the picture of “the eyes” so he knows to leave me alone when I get to that point. 
I love that you had a home birth (I had hospital births) and the picture of Rich sleeping next to the brand new baby just strikes me as so beautiful and strange because who goes back to bed and sleeps after something that big and exciting?!? Oh that’s right…a guy
So beautiful. I cried. I cry over all birth stories. Thankfully I don’t get agitated or crazy, I just want it over. My second labor was only 3 hrs from first contraction to her sliding on out. I just hope I make it to the hospital for this little boy, but I doubt it.
Congratulations on her beautiful family. <3
LOVE! Congrats!
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Loved reading this story! I “met” you on instagram (recently asked about the mamaroo) I am minutes or days away from having my 8th and loved…just LOVED reading your story! Then as if it was interesting and may I add very well written… you have a pick of a true knot! My 4th birth was that way:
http://aseedinspired.com/2011/08/19/new-birth/
(picture included)
You looked great throughout your whole pregnancy and you did great birthing.
Congrats mama~
T
I am cracking up over your captions about Rich! Glad to hear that he read this before it was released to the world.
And, Aiden is the cutest. I can see why you can’t stop staring at him. I bet he’s great for cuddling. I’m sort of awestruck that his cord had a true knot in it, you are truly blessed.
Congrats again!
I love your story and can relate to it too. I also had my 10th, a boy last September.
My labors ( and my helpful husband ) are just like yours…. Stumbled on your IG feed.
Peace,
Michelle
Love the realness of your experience. I tried for one of those “perfect”birth stories, but let’s face it…it ain’t always planned and pretty. It is always a beautiful experience, though. Thank you for giving us a glimpse into your private moments and sharing with us! Such a blessed family
This isn’t a “birth story, of sorts”, it’s a BIRTH STORY, and it’s beautiful and real and honest and special. It’s perfect because it’s Aiden’s, and he’ll love hearing it one day.
It isn’t fair to sell yourself short because some bloggers out there go out…not for the babies, of course. What baby is thrilled to be birthed into a room with music and candles and gift bags for the nurses?!? It’s for an audience, wheras your story is for you and your family.
Serious…tiaras and a playlist and a beautiful nightgown? Ain’t nobody got time for that! 😉
Before I published this post, Rich and I read it over together, and we were both laughing. Because it happened exactly that way, and you’re right; the husband is there so we have someone to snap at. Rich has been through it enough times with me to know. And yes, I do need to change my blog header! Too bad because I really like the one I have on there now. Oh well.
Great pictures, thank you for the consideration. Sorry, but I was laughing through most of this watching as your Husband tried to help and knowing the feeling of being entirely useless and being there primarily so mom has someone to be pissed off at…I know that look!! You probably know my feeling that dad should be in a room chain smoking and pacing but out of the way!!
Well done Mom!! Now you have to change your blog cover.